|Subject:||Re: first kiss (read and comment, please :D)|
|Author:||ClementineFox7 (Authenticated as ClementineFox7)|
|Date:||January 18, 2013 at 8:16:33 AM|
|Reply to:||first kiss (read and comment, please :D) by Julia Elisabeth|
I really like that the kiss was not magical! That perfect first kiss that makes you feel like your are floating, or whatever, is so boring and cliche. I think Emma sounds very believable. One thing, I wasn't sure of. I'm assuming this is just a paragraph to a larger scene? Because right now it it very confusing who Max is and not knowing they are at a party. But, like I said, I'm assuming this is just part of a larger scene. Good job!
|Messages in this thread:|
|Home : Boards : The Writing Room||
Copyright © |