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Re: Still suffering from name regret-thoughts/advice appreciated (LONG)
This is a big deal. I think you need to spend a lot of time talking with your husband about this. There's only so much help we can be. Some of us will love Rosalie, some of us won't. Some of us will think you're "just" hormonal, some of us won't. Since you are the one who is thinking of the change, I think the idea of setting a time limit on the discussion is a good one. If he is up for that. Maybe you can say you reconvene in two weeks with a list of names you both like better than Rosalie. Mull over each other's lists and see if there's anything you can agree on. If not, there is absolutely positively not a single thing in the world wrong with Rosalie. And people will figure out how to pronounce it, I promise. I really don't think you will love Rosalie any less just because her name is not your number one favourite. People adopt/foster/parent children whose names they did not choose all the time. At some point you will need to accept that your daughter's name for what it is (whether you change it or not) and move on. I hope you can find peace with this soon.
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hmm, OK, i was thinking I needed to do it by tonight. I was just on the phone with a close friend and she was so surprised about my regret, saying she thought Rosalie was a home run. Part of me wonders if I do just need to let it go, but part of me does want some time to mull it over. I like your idea of our both coming to the table with names. he has never offered up names because he says I always come up with something he likes-and i don't think he will this time since he is happy with Rosalie. The burden will be on me. I'll definitely place a limit on any time to discuss per his request and your suggestions, but I'll need to come up with something other than names he has vetoed.Interesting point about my not loving it less-simply because it was not #1...I am warming up back up to it now that many people have dispelled the notion of it's tackiness or potential common mis-emphasizing. Still feeling a bit morose about it's not ending in A, so i will do a bit more hunting and then I'll need to call it quits.
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I think you should definitely give yourself a week or two, not just until tonight. Make a list and see if you like another name better. Or try to remember what you loved about Rosalie! Was Rosalia ever an option?
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Hi,
No I didn't care for Rosalia so it never came up. Ok, I will try to patiently give myself a few days and make up a list. Problem is 1)It seems like such a time-sensitive issue and 2)I just keep coming back to the same names now, all of which he vetoed!!!! It is helping me that outsiders like her name so much, and I am guessing that your other suggestion of my remembering why I liked Rosalie will be the path I'll need to take. I probably need to give myself a while to et away from the thoughts of "Rosa Lee" ringing in my ears.
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OK is an alternative maybe to stop minding Rosa Lee so much?
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Yes, I could try to just ignore it and be my own person and be confident in my name choice-I just don't know if I can stomach it ALL her life and I am worried I won't get over it.FWIW I have talked to him and he says he's willing for me to CALL her Violet, that he'd be a little sad as he likes Rosalie and thinks it is wrong to change any child's name after that child is named-but he'd be willing to call her violet w/o an official name change and that's about it. He's happy with Rosalie and has no intention of changing it. So my option is really to decide if I want to call her by her middle name Violet now, or stick with her given first name. He thinks Katrina sounds too Russian????
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Well said, I agree! Especially about the time limit
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