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HelpRe: Will Violet be called Vi?
in reply to a message by naomism
I think this is so funny. Why do you hate Vi? It's like, one syllable. It's the most emphasized syllable in the name that you love. Shortening names is a way to show familiarity and affection. How can you hate it so much? Like, LOL.
You can forcibly prevent nicknaming! You can make it a big issue, you can instruct people severely not to call her Vi, and instruct her to instruct people severely not to call her Vi. But then you've just made a Big Thing in your life and hers out of something that could be a Small Thing, a No Thing, or a Nice Thing. You've created a little neurosis. And you've made yourself goofy to people around you who are less bothered. And also her best friends and lovers might go to affectionately call her "Vi" and then remember that it's Verboten and feel sad. And it will make them lonely. And the loneliness will rub off onto her. And her life will be terrible. The end.
You can forcibly prevent nicknaming! You can make it a big issue, you can instruct people severely not to call her Vi, and instruct her to instruct people severely not to call her Vi. But then you've just made a Big Thing in your life and hers out of something that could be a Small Thing, a No Thing, or a Nice Thing. You've created a little neurosis. And you've made yourself goofy to people around you who are less bothered. And also her best friends and lovers might go to affectionately call her "Vi" and then remember that it's Verboten and feel sad. And it will make them lonely. And the loneliness will rub off onto her. And her life will be terrible. The end.
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Replies
I think you know how I feel about unwanted nicknames ;)
My SO will slip in a "Mady" every once in awhile on accident and then quickly add "-son" because he knows I hate it. I highly doubt that makes him feel sad or lonely (I'm sure you don't mean that literally) But it does makes me feel happy to know he's consistently considering my feelings. Actually it's forced he and my friends to come of with more creative, MORE personal nicknames, and of their own volition. Shortening names is a sign of affection, sure, but not using a NN they don't like is also a sign of respect.
My parents never asked I NOT be called Mady, in fact it's a name my aunts would, and still call me occasionally, and I reserve it for them because I've never felt like a Mady and have never personally chosen to go by it. Which is also why I'd advise against using a name with a NN you can't stand, because your child may choose to go by it anyway, ESPECIALLY if they know you hate it and want to be rebellious. Not being jazzed about it is one thing but actively hating it is another, although I suspect that the hate would lessen once it's on your kid.
My SO will slip in a "Mady" every once in awhile on accident and then quickly add "-son" because he knows I hate it. I highly doubt that makes him feel sad or lonely (I'm sure you don't mean that literally) But it does makes me feel happy to know he's consistently considering my feelings. Actually it's forced he and my friends to come of with more creative, MORE personal nicknames, and of their own volition. Shortening names is a sign of affection, sure, but not using a NN they don't like is also a sign of respect.
My parents never asked I NOT be called Mady, in fact it's a name my aunts would, and still call me occasionally, and I reserve it for them because I've never felt like a Mady and have never personally chosen to go by it. Which is also why I'd advise against using a name with a NN you can't stand, because your child may choose to go by it anyway, ESPECIALLY if they know you hate it and want to be rebellious. Not being jazzed about it is one thing but actively hating it is another, although I suspect that the hate would lessen once it's on your kid.
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Oh. If I was your bf I'd feel oppressed in this circumstance.
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Which is why I'm so happy he isn't you. Feeling "opressed" by other people's preferences must be really tough
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People call me Rach all the time, and I couldn't care less. So, I agree with you 100%.
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Agree.
My in-laws do not use nicknames, at all. Their kids are Alexander, Elizabeth, Damian, Katherine, Mary, Christopher and Anthony. It's ridiculous how upset they get if someone dares to use a nickname. If you didn't want people to nickname your kids, then why use such long names? My husband is the only one who uses a nickname and it's mostly due to me.
My in-laws do not use nicknames, at all. Their kids are Alexander, Elizabeth, Damian, Katherine, Mary, Christopher and Anthony. It's ridiculous how upset they get if someone dares to use a nickname. If you didn't want people to nickname your kids, then why use such long names? My husband is the only one who uses a nickname and it's mostly due to me.
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Wow and some of those are long names too! I can't imagine some of them NOT having a nn. Having said that, I have a nephew named Christopher and I'm the only one in the family who calls him that. Eh, it just feels right and is more interesting than just Chris.
I think some parents don't realize that their child's name doesn't really belong to them and that the child may want a nn or a variation of the birth name. That's not including all the friends, associates, etc., this person will encounter throughout their lifetime. Some nns evolve quite naturally and it's no cause for alarm. Sad that some would freak out about it.
Your dh is part of a very nice sibset, though.
I think some parents don't realize that their child's name doesn't really belong to them and that the child may want a nn or a variation of the birth name. That's not including all the friends, associates, etc., this person will encounter throughout their lifetime. Some nns evolve quite naturally and it's no cause for alarm. Sad that some would freak out about it.
Your dh is part of a very nice sibset, though.
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This is why.....(m)
I missed you when you were gone.
I missed you when you were gone.
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Ditto
Emma's wisdom is a gift to these boards.
Emma's wisdom is a gift to these boards.
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