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Im am a father to be.
I have not discussed this with the mother yet only because I have not thought of it when we are around one another.
Question. Do I have a choice who the baby is named after. Mother or father? Not married? If im not at the hospital, can the mother pick her last name instead of mine for the baby?
Just wondering. ?
I have not discussed this with the mother yet only because I have not thought of it when we are around one another.
Question. Do I have a choice who the baby is named after. Mother or father? Not married? If im not at the hospital, can the mother pick her last name instead of mine for the baby?
Just wondering. ?
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Replies
I finally just read this. You're not telling us everything, John! Spill it!
Are you a dead beat dad? Or did she get a court order against you? Or both! Grow up! Be a man! Mail a check!
Are you a dead beat dad? Or did she get a court order against you? Or both! Grow up! Be a man! Mail a check!
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In addition...
Any (presumably) adult male who automatically calls any woman who irritates him "a bitch", is probably abusive, as well.
-- Nanaea
Any (presumably) adult male who automatically calls any woman who irritates him "a bitch", is probably abusive, as well.
-- Nanaea
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Oh Yeah!
The last person who called me a bitch on this website, Nan burnt her house down!
How dare you call Nan the B word! Your trailer's going down, babe!
The last person who called me a bitch on this website, Nan burnt her house down!
How dare you call Nan the B word! Your trailer's going down, babe!
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John,
Laws vary by state, of course, but I tend to think that if the mother and father are married, the child in most states has to assume whatever legal last name the father bears at that time, OR may be given a hyphenated combo of the parents' last names (which I personally find awkward and unattractive unless you're a character in a P.G. Wodehouse story, but that's merely my opinion.)
If the mother and father are NOT married, the mother probably has the option legally of giving the child either last name (I see this around here quite often).
It may be possible in some places to give the child an entirely different last name, if you so desire. The local County Clerk's office (if you're in the US) can probably tell you definitively what the legal options are in your state.
Please note that I am not a lawyer, nor do I play one on TV. Further proof that God is merciful...
Laws vary by state, of course, but I tend to think that if the mother and father are married, the child in most states has to assume whatever legal last name the father bears at that time, OR may be given a hyphenated combo of the parents' last names (which I personally find awkward and unattractive unless you're a character in a P.G. Wodehouse story, but that's merely my opinion.)
If the mother and father are NOT married, the mother probably has the option legally of giving the child either last name (I see this around here quite often).
It may be possible in some places to give the child an entirely different last name, if you so desire. The local County Clerk's office (if you're in the US) can probably tell you definitively what the legal options are in your state.
Please note that I am not a lawyer, nor do I play one on TV. Further proof that God is merciful...
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Unless paternity has been established, the mother has the right to put "Unknown" on the child's birth certificate in place of where your last name would go.
Once paternity has been established (and, depending on which state in the U.S.A. you live in, this can be done as simply as your signing a paternity affidavit, or by the mother publishing your name in a newspaper) you will be financially responsible for the support of this child for perhaps the next 18 years of your life.
If you are not married to this woman who is about to bear your child, then you have a LOT of things to discuss with her. Perhaps the least important of all is the vanity of seeing your last name on the birth certificate.
-- Nanaea
Once paternity has been established (and, depending on which state in the U.S.A. you live in, this can be done as simply as your signing a paternity affidavit, or by the mother publishing your name in a newspaper) you will be financially responsible for the support of this child for perhaps the next 18 years of your life.
If you are not married to this woman who is about to bear your child, then you have a LOT of things to discuss with her. Perhaps the least important of all is the vanity of seeing your last name on the birth certificate.
-- Nanaea
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Nanaea
I'm not quite sure, but I think on most of the birth certificates that I've seen, the father is NOT mentioned, except for the last name of the child. Even my birth certificate lists my mother, but under her maiden name. The only places I've encountered where you need the father's name is for Social Security numbers, insurance (medical and dental especially), and "government assistance" (used to called welfare, and I think it still is in some places). I'm not sure if you need the father's name to register for public school.
Phyllis (aka Sidhe Uaine or Gaia Euphoria)
I'm not quite sure, but I think on most of the birth certificates that I've seen, the father is NOT mentioned, except for the last name of the child. Even my birth certificate lists my mother, but under her maiden name. The only places I've encountered where you need the father's name is for Social Security numbers, insurance (medical and dental especially), and "government assistance" (used to called welfare, and I think it still is in some places). I'm not sure if you need the father's name to register for public school.
Phyllis (aka Sidhe Uaine or Gaia Euphoria)
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Gosh, Was it something yousaid? n/t LOL
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I am new to this board. But by scanning some of the previous messages and replies to posts, especially the ones that you have replied to. I am going to go out on a limb here a speculate that you are a major “know it all” bitch with an “I’m mightier than thou” attitude. First impressions do count!
I would just like you and thank you for running me off on my first visit. I will not spend my time corresponding with the likes of you.
In the future you should consider keeping your wicked and degrading tongue on a leash.
Thanx.
I would just like you and thank you for running me off on my first visit. I will not spend my time corresponding with the likes of you.
In the future you should consider keeping your wicked and degrading tongue on a leash.
Thanx.
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Gine to the John?
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Dear John...
Oh dear, did I hurt your feelings? I shall now go back to my original posting to you, and examine exactly what it was I said that may have caused you such pain and suffering.
"Unless paternity has been established, the mother has the right to put "Unknown" on the child's birth certificate in place of where your last name would go."
Well, yes, I can see how THAT must have stung. Obviously you and the baby's mother are at some kind of odds. You did say: "I have not discussed this with the mother yet only because I have not thought of it when we are around one another." Uh-huh, so you already think there's a chance she may just leave your name off the birth certificate? If there was NO question already in your mind as to whether or not your baby's mother was going to put your name on the birth certificate there would be NO need for you to ask a group of strangers about it. Oooo, I'll bet *you're* a clever one, researching ways to get around this woman's wishes.
Let's see, what else did I say which might have upset you? Oh yes!
"Once paternity has been established (and, depending on which state in the U.S.A. you live in, this can be done as simply as your signing a paternity affidavit, or by the mother publishing your name in a newspaper) you will be financially responsible for the support of this child for perhaps the next 18 years of your life."
Face it, John, reality bites.
"If you are not married to this woman who is about to bear your child, then you have a LOT of things to discuss with her. Perhaps the least important of all is the vanity of seeing your last name on the birth certificate."
Yes, you *do* have a lot of things to discuss with this woman. And if my use of the word "vanity" stung you a bit, then eh! Quite frankly, I don't give a flying duck what you think. As well as my being (in your perception) a "major know-it-all bitch", I also happen to be judgemental. I'm judgemental of deadbeats, imbeciles, and lameasses.
Oh dear, did I hurt your feelings? I shall now go back to my original posting to you, and examine exactly what it was I said that may have caused you such pain and suffering.
"Unless paternity has been established, the mother has the right to put "Unknown" on the child's birth certificate in place of where your last name would go."
Well, yes, I can see how THAT must have stung. Obviously you and the baby's mother are at some kind of odds. You did say: "I have not discussed this with the mother yet only because I have not thought of it when we are around one another." Uh-huh, so you already think there's a chance she may just leave your name off the birth certificate? If there was NO question already in your mind as to whether or not your baby's mother was going to put your name on the birth certificate there would be NO need for you to ask a group of strangers about it. Oooo, I'll bet *you're* a clever one, researching ways to get around this woman's wishes.
Let's see, what else did I say which might have upset you? Oh yes!
"Once paternity has been established (and, depending on which state in the U.S.A. you live in, this can be done as simply as your signing a paternity affidavit, or by the mother publishing your name in a newspaper) you will be financially responsible for the support of this child for perhaps the next 18 years of your life."
Face it, John, reality bites.
"If you are not married to this woman who is about to bear your child, then you have a LOT of things to discuss with her. Perhaps the least important of all is the vanity of seeing your last name on the birth certificate."
Yes, you *do* have a lot of things to discuss with this woman. And if my use of the word "vanity" stung you a bit, then eh! Quite frankly, I don't give a flying duck what you think. As well as my being (in your perception) a "major know-it-all bitch", I also happen to be judgemental. I'm judgemental of deadbeats, imbeciles, and lameasses.
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Nanaea
Unfortunately, concerning assuming full responsability for the support and *upbringing* of a child, a man doesn't have to be married to the woman. I know of a few males (I don't consider them real men) who are married to the mothers of some, if not all, of their children, yet do NOT contribute to the support and/or *upbringing* of the offspring.
Case in point, my brother-in-law, who up until a week ago, could be found laying on the couch watching tv. He complained that he had a bad back and couldn't work to support his six children. He even said that to a friend of my brother (who incidently has eight children, two or three back surgeries and three jobs). It wasn't until a notice of foreclosure was handed to him that he decided to get off his lazy rump and find a job.
Brother-in-law's idea of taking care of the children: "Shut up, lay down and watch tv."
Phyllis (aka Sidhe Uaine or Gaia Euphoria)
Unfortunately, concerning assuming full responsability for the support and *upbringing* of a child, a man doesn't have to be married to the woman. I know of a few males (I don't consider them real men) who are married to the mothers of some, if not all, of their children, yet do NOT contribute to the support and/or *upbringing* of the offspring.
Case in point, my brother-in-law, who up until a week ago, could be found laying on the couch watching tv. He complained that he had a bad back and couldn't work to support his six children. He even said that to a friend of my brother (who incidently has eight children, two or three back surgeries and three jobs). It wasn't until a notice of foreclosure was handed to him that he decided to get off his lazy rump and find a job.
Brother-in-law's idea of taking care of the children: "Shut up, lay down and watch tv."
Phyllis (aka Sidhe Uaine or Gaia Euphoria)
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Which is precisely why I included in my message to Dear John that "the woman who is going to bear your child may have told you, point-blank, that she doesn't want to be married to you, and I'll be kind and not even speculate as to why she may feel that way."
-- Nanaea
-- Nanaea
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Cant wait for Nan's "Dear John" letter :PPP
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Errrr?
>>I am new to this board.>But by scanning some of the previous messages and replies to posts, especially the ones that you have replied to.>I am going to go out on a limb here a speculate that you are a major “know it all” bitch with an “I’m mightier than thou” attitude.>First impressions do count!>I would just like you and thank you for running me off on my first visit. I will not spend my time corresponding with the likes of you.>In the future you should consider keeping your wicked and degrading tongue on a leash.<<
As opposed to you who have shown almost saintly restraint in your response. Do as I say, not as I do, huh?
>>I am new to this board.>But by scanning some of the previous messages and replies to posts, especially the ones that you have replied to.>I am going to go out on a limb here a speculate that you are a major “know it all” bitch with an “I’m mightier than thou” attitude.>First impressions do count!>I would just like you and thank you for running me off on my first visit. I will not spend my time corresponding with the likes of you.>In the future you should consider keeping your wicked and degrading tongue on a leash.<<
As opposed to you who have shown almost saintly restraint in your response. Do as I say, not as I do, huh?
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Sorry, that didn't work out right -- here it is again...
"I am new to this board."
Clearly.
"But by scanning some of the previous messages and replies to posts, especially the ones that you have replied to."
In what school district is this considered a sentence?
"I am going to go out on a limb here a speculate that you are a major “know it all” bitch with an “I’m mightier than thou” attitude."
I am going to go out on a limb and suggest that no one here cares what you think. Nanaea? Do you care? No? I didn't think so.
"First impressions do count!"
Right back atcha, Johnny!
"I would just like you and thank you for running me off on my first visit. I will not spend my time corresponding with the likes of you."
Do you mean you won't spend any *more* time? Kind of dumb to say you won't correspond *while* you're typing a correspondence.
"In the future you should consider keeping your wicked and degrading tongue on a leash."
And again...As opposed to you who have shown almost saintly restraint in your response. Do as I say, not as I do, huh?
"I am new to this board."
Clearly.
"But by scanning some of the previous messages and replies to posts, especially the ones that you have replied to."
In what school district is this considered a sentence?
"I am going to go out on a limb here a speculate that you are a major “know it all” bitch with an “I’m mightier than thou” attitude."
I am going to go out on a limb and suggest that no one here cares what you think. Nanaea? Do you care? No? I didn't think so.
"First impressions do count!"
Right back atcha, Johnny!
"I would just like you and thank you for running me off on my first visit. I will not spend my time corresponding with the likes of you."
Do you mean you won't spend any *more* time? Kind of dumb to say you won't correspond *while* you're typing a correspondence.
"In the future you should consider keeping your wicked and degrading tongue on a leash."
And again...As opposed to you who have shown almost saintly restraint in your response. Do as I say, not as I do, huh?
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Oh! You guys scared off my new boyfriend!
PS It's funny. Mike seemed scared of commitment, but not scared of getting me pregnant. (And I was the opposite!)
PS It's funny. Mike seemed scared of commitment, but not scared of getting me pregnant. (And I was the opposite!)
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Well said! My thoughts exactly!
:)
:)
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