|Subject:||Maybe a bit late, but still fun!|
|Author:||Caprice (Authenticated as Caprice)|
|Date:||January 2, 2013 at 1:13:27 PM|
I have a (Swedish) book with children's letters to Santa. Some are hilarious. One of the most hilarious things is the misspellings, but obviously they are not fun if you don't know Swedish. But I can explain one: A boy has written that he wants a "snorbord". Of course he means a snowboard, but "snorbord" literally means "snot table" in Swedish! :)
I translated some of the letters. I hope you will think they are fun!
"I am a boy and my name is Alvin I don't believe in Santa and if I see you I will pull your beard off."
"Hi Santa by the way I believe in Santa. My name is Emelie Andersson. I want to ask you some questions. You can find them if you turn the paper over. Here comes the first one:
1. In Saltkråkan [popular Swedish TV series for children, based on stories by Astrid Lindgren. Seacrow Island in English] Pelle says there is no Santa. Is that true?
2. Where do you live?
3. Do you have a girlfriend? If you don't have one you can have me."
"Hi Santa I want a bazoka for Christmas. Robin"
"Hi! My name is Emma and I am 9 years old. I would like these things for Christmas: A plush animal, clothes, money, slippers, earrings, jewellery, nightdress and can you make my sister disappear?"
"Merry Christmas Redman! I am the kindest and sweetest boy on earth but you don't seem to give a darn. I didn't get many things for Christmas last year. Belt up. Jon Forsberg."
"Hi Santa. My name is Emmy. I live in Gothenburg and I take jazz ballet lessons. I would like: A mobile phone, The Sims Hot Date, make-up and that mum and dad are nice to me! PLEASE don't give Maja Jansson anything, she has been mean to me and my friend Miranda during ballet class!"
"Hi Santa. My name is Joel. I am 8 and I live in Gröndal [part of Stockholm]. Why don't you exist? Last Christmas I didn't get half of the things I wanted. Give me what I want this Christmas! P.S. You deserve a #&/%& in your stomach! Merry Christmas from Joel. Turn over for wishing list:
Plays Station 2, Game Boy advance, computer games, money, RC car/boat/airplane, 73 inch TV, ice cream machine, computer, candy and potato chips, new house."
"Hi Santa. My name is Viktor and I'm 8. My little brother is called Max and he's 4. Mum says I can't get everything I want for Christmas. But Max can have my own toys. Then it won't be too expensive for you."
"Steve's wishing list: Stereo; CD; Harry Potter LEGO; straightjacket size 130; ant pesticide; colour pens; a big swim crocodile [I guess he means an inflatable one]; drawing paper; eraser and pencil sharpener; a merry Christmas."
"Hi ¤%#¤¤% Santa! What a ¤&%& tiny ""%)= Christmas calendar you gave my class. Can't you buy us Christmas gifts next year #%%% Santa! From Orvar. I hope you'll die!"
"Hi Santa. My name is Josefin and I'm 10. My sister is called Sara and she's just 5 and I think she's pretty annoying. I want a rabbit with long ears and silky fur. Mum says I can't have a rabbit, but if I get it from you, I promise not to tell. I can hide it in my cupboard. It will be our secret. You can cuddle with it every Christmas. But you have to give me the rabbit when mum's not looking. She would be furious."
"Drop dead stupid old man! You just give me things I don't want! Like sweaters and underwear!!! Shape up! I'll give you one last chance. If you give me a Play station I miiiight believe in you. Bye for now! Fredrik."
"Hi Santa. My name is Adam and I'm eight. My birthday is January 11th. Do you live in Antarctica? If you do, say hi to the penguins from me. Adam."
"Hi Santa. My name is Linus. My dad says you will visit us by entering through the stove. But then you have to call us first so we can put the fire out. Linus 6 years old."
Does the sea exist
Because of our longing?
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