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Allarah-Jayne: For some reason Allarah sounds medicinal to me.
Ammariah: Just Mariah is fine. "But I AM Mariah!"
Attascha Arabelle: Attach an Arabelle.
Aziza: Kind of cute.
Bess: Big fat farmhand.
Betty: Cute ... on a grandma.
Cindel Mariah: Cindel makes no sense to me.
Cleo: Cat name.
Delphie: Cutesy.
Dziah: Is this supposed to be a tarted-up pronunciation of desire?
Essie Violet: Violet is fine, but Essie is Bess's jabbering baby daughter who's always running around barefoot in the manure pile.
Ffion Arna: Ugh.
Isobella Bluebell: Is a bell a bluebell? This is so silly.
Lalelei Celena: My tongue is tangled in a knot. Selena is nice.
Lowenna: Low.
Lyrikal: Silly hip-hop stage name.
Majesty Krystal: A company you can register for before your wedding so you can get tacky glassware.
Meadow Constance: Some herb that's said to be good for headache and PMS.
Nirvannah-Leigh: Kurt Cobain is rolling in his grave.
Ocean-Grace: Set a new record for solo crossing of the Atlantic Ocean.
Paraiscea-Faith: I can't make head or tail of this.
Rucha: Does nothing for me, but it looks more like an old Eastern European name than a silly mashup like a lot of these other names.
Sabine: I like Sabrina much better.
Samurai: Japan might be tempted to invade New Zealand if they hear how dumb this kid's parents were.
Sathera Willow Irene: Irene is nice, Willow is sort of cute, but Sathera is a mouthful.
Seraphine: Sounds like an airtight wrapping for food.
Sparrow: Dumb dumb dumb.
Velinka: Seems off somehow but can't put my finger on why.
Zola Rose: Zola? Please.

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Ardie John: Ardie just looks like a 1930's Ozark rendering of Artie, which is childish and silly.
Aries Henare Aranga: Aries seems overblown.
Arteen: Arty teenager?
Beaude Lueken: Yuck.
Beauden: Ug lee.
Deejay-Lee: Screams low-class.
Edge: Another silly stage name.
Elvis: Let it go, people. The king is dead and his name wasn't all that great anyway.
Ezeriah: Torn between Ezra and Isaiah.
Gibson: That drink with the little onions in it.
Havahn: Havahn a hard time.
Jayland-Nicholas: They need to quit with these dashes.
Jhemiello Eliel: You need a better Scrabble hand.
Junot: Is that supposed to be pronounced Juno? Because that t doesn't make it easier or more masculine.
Kato: Remember O.J. Simpson's friend, Kato Kalin?
Krayven: Craven means cowardly.
Kroy: Ugly.
Legend: Pretentious much?
Luxton: Rolls eyes.
Lyhla Grace: This is a boy? Poor kid. And Lyhla is terrible on either one.
Rigby: Silly.
Wyatt-Kaide: Just name him Wyatt and shut up.

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